Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Desperate Willy Allison Brings in "Cybersatirist" to Keynote 2011 World Game Protection Conference!...The Joke's on Him!

Not Worth Going
Not only has Allison, desperately trying to keep his dwindling WGPC attendee-list from getting shorter, outdone himself this year by bringing in a so-called "cybersatirist" to headline the conference, he has even added himself to the list of guest speakers as he cannot find anyone else with casino game-protection credibility to fill the holes. I mean, PLEASE, Willie, I can understand if you wanna bring in a cybercomic to crack a few jokes, which your World Game Protection Conference has become, but WHAT ON HEAVEN'S EARTH HAS A CYBERSATIRIST GOT TO DO WITH CASINO GAME PROTECTION OR ANYTHING ELSE THAT CONTAINS THE WORD "CASINO"? You are really insulting your list of potential attendees, and the ones who do indeed attend this year are really insulting themselves!

Oh, and by the way, the cybersatirist's name is Bob Hirschfeld if anybody cares.

Let's look at the rest of Allison's 2011 WGPC lineup:

Of course there are Bill Zender and Sal Piacente, the same one-plus-one combination that adds up to the same bullshit we've seen each of the past five years. At least at the conference, Zender doesn't have to email you with his stock line, "I still have seats available for my game protection training seminar in your area..." He can tell you at the beginning, middle and end of his presentation, which I'm sure he will.

And Piacente (who calls himself "Sal the Hitman") can wow you with his tired card tricks before he takes the podium with some more stuff which will hardly outdo his card tricks. Back at the 2007 WGPC, Piacente did a presentation on high-tech digital cheating. I, for one, wondered how Piacente knew so much on this subject given it had nothing to do with his past. Did he really know the ins and outs of high-tech cheating or did Allison have him take a brush-up course to get him ready for his gig? What do you think?

Next we have Jason England who for this edition of Allison's conference is being billed a slot cheat expert who is going to take you inside the mind of a slot cheat. That's a LAUGH! Gimme a break! Jason England is just another card trickster who knows some magic. How all of a sudden did he become a slot cheat expert?

Then there's a guy called Todd Morris who is going to talk about some fancy electronic gadgets that might or might not be applicable to casino game protection. I do not know much about him and have never met him, so I will let this one go.

Sitting in on a panel calling its presentation "The Incident Reports" is Darren Hoke, a casino surveillance director from a minor casino property in Louisiana. Hoke is another one of Allison's grinders who makes the rounds on his casino game protection "circuit."

Las Vegas attorney Bob Nersesian is going to give a presentation on how "casino stupidy" (Allison's program's actual words) helps customers suing casinos win judgements in court. Although Nersesian is a very versatile and respected attorney in his fields, this presentation doesn't have much to do with game protection and would serve better if given to a group of casino lawyers and not the typical surveillance people who attend the World Game Protection Conference.

Finally we will hear from Keith Copher, a 25-year veteran with the Nevada Gaming Control Board, ten years of which was spent as chief of its Enforcement Division. Copher may be the only presenter/speaker at the conference who is applicable to casino game protection, as he surely has a history of dealing with casino cheats and how the State of Nevada has dealt with them over the years. However, Copher has given all this up to become a gaming compliance consultant and a board member for the Organized Crime and Law Enforcement Museum, speaking of which: I think it's time for Allison's World Game Protection Conference to be put in a museum somewhere...it's that archaic.

Best Poker Cheat Story of 2010

Poker Heist Suspects
Well, I'd call it poker cheating in its most devastating form. That's when poker cheats become poker thieves or robbers and just heist the poker jackpot instead of winning it.

That's exactly what happened on March 7, 2010 at a European Poker Tour tournament at the posh Hyatt Hotel in downtown Berlin, Germany. Four men wearing disguises and brandishing guns and machetes stormed into the poker room set up by the Hyatt and helped themselves to nearly $350,000 of what was to be a $1.36 Million first-prize jackpot. I don't know why they didn't get all the money in the jackpot. Maybe it wasn't on the table when they struck.

The German cops, armed with good surveillance video of the poker heist, searched the city for two weeks before one of the poker robbers panicked and gave himself up. The 21-year-old German national told the cops that he and his three cohorts split the money immediately after the heist. He also ratted out their names. This sounds like the German version of the famous/infamous USA Brinks Heist gone-wrong-after-the-succesful-robbery in the 1950s.

The three suspects on the run were identified as 20-year-old Ahmad el-Awayti, 19-year-old Jihad Chetwie, and 20-year-old and Mustafa Ucarkus. Apparently all four of these suspects were German nationals of Turkish and Arabic descent. But judging by the names, could this have been a crime to finance some act of international terrorisim? Given that it occurred in Germany, where the 9/11 attack plans originated, this possibility cannot be overlooked. In any case, the suspects were all caught and the money recovered, so whatever the poker cheat thieves were going to do with their loot is now moot, pardon the pun...or rhyme.

The first suspect told police that he had cased the Hyatt for several days before the robbery and noticed that the hotel guards did not carry weapons, and that it looked like an easy heist to pull off.

American poker pro Kevin MacPhee won the tournament and received all the first-place jackpot money thanks to the Hyatt's insurance coverage. He also told the media that there was a lot of shouting and hysteria during the robbery.

My take: I would just love to see this type of heist go down at the final table of the main event at the World Series of Poker in Las Vegas. Wow! Wouldn't that be a nice score!!!